Underachieving is Okay.

Striving relentlessly to succeed, we often end up in burnouts from overworking. The ambition to succeed is ingrained into our brain since childhood from parents or society that constantly tell us that you must succeed in the workplace to afford shinny BMWs, the latest gadgets, or luxurious vacations. These things may bring temporary joy but not ever lasting happiness. They are like salt water. The more you drink, the thirstier you become. What really matters in life may have nothing to do with how wealthy and successful you are. Sometimes you just need to relax in the face of a busy life with many demands. Life may be happier if we are less ambitious and stop craving for more. We can breathe easier and begin to feel free as pressure to achieve lessens. Clinging very strongly to success causes suffering according to Buddhism. Detachment does not mean that you have to give up everything and go live in a cave. It simply means it is okay to be mediocre and live an ordinary life without material wealth. Life would be simpler or happier without the pressure to constantly achieve.

Why me?

Life is full of joy but also setbacks or disappointments. When they occur, we often ask ourselves, “Why me.” We may spend endless time pondering on why we did not receive that deserved promotion, why our relationship ended in a divorce, why we received a notice of job layoff, and why we lost our entire savings on risky investments. Worrying events that have already happened is futile, heart trenching, and hinder to our happiness. Remember that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel regardless how dire the situation it may seem. Even though there aren’t too many things we can control, we do however can control our feeling or attitude to overcome adversities and view them as opportunities to reflect or make corrections and open the true potential of the next stage of our life. In short, pick ourselves up and move on!

To bear Insult and Disgrace

Ability to forebear is a virtue. .. a moment of anger can destroy one’s lifetime of merits.

Spousal abuse, child abuse or drive-by shootings is a result of inability of people to control their emotions. If we want peace and order in our lives, we must put an end to our negative emotions.

Losing control over our emotions can lead to negative consequences that may change the course of history and profoundly impact the lives of many generations.

Enduring pain and hardship from insult and disgrace takes tremendous efforts to, but it is an act of courage and great confidence in your ability to forebear. It is NOT an act of cowardice. It takes strength, wisdom and compassion to resolve conflicts by reasoning and kindness.

However, we need to define our boundaries. We need to stand up for ourselves when others treat us badly or put us down. Often this requires bravery. We need to forego our feat and take a stance of our beliefs.